Let's Commute-nicate

I’ve been using public transportation long enough to know this: taking public transport is a great way to reflect on life.

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Using public transportation helps you realize that you’re not alone in this world.

Well, of course, because 1) you have to “fight” with many people to be able to get in, 2) you need to move fast to save yourself a seat, and 3) you’ll get crammed by others. So, of course, you’re NOT alone. But that’s physically.

Mentally too, you’re not alone. In the morning, you’ll see people who are as sleepy as you (unpopular opinion: I think public transportation is like a school bus for adults, because I’ve seen people in their best formal outfits and makeup sleeping like babies).

At night, you’ll see people who are as tired as you – which, if you look at each one of their faces, you’ll think, “They must have their story too. After all, everyone is the main character in their own world.” Seeing other passengers you encounter makes you realize that you’re not alone in this adulting journey.

BUT, when I say this, don’t take it as if I’m harshly telling you, “You’re not the only one who’s having a hard time. A lot of people out there are having a hard time too. Grow up!” No. It’s more like a soft reminder that, “It’s okay if you’re feeling this way. Many others are dealing with the same thing. Let’s face this together.” You’re not alone.

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Using public transportation also gives you time to spend with yourself (funny, isn’t it? The way I mention this right after telling you that you’re not alone).

The thing is, even though you’re there with other people, you’re not actually with them. You put on those earphones and enjoy that music by yourself. I also saw a guy who’s happy in his little bubble as he read his book. Recently, I even dared myself to watch a K-Drama on the bus (I used to think it wasn’t safe). Again, to be enjoyed on my own.

Talking about the K-Drama I’ve been watching, the title is “My Liberation Notes.” If you like to watch K-Dramas, you’re probably familiar with this slice-of-life drama. But if you don’t, to give you a picture of what “My Liberation Notes” is about, it tells the story of three siblings – all office workers – who are feeling tired, frustrated, and stifled by their lives.

At first, I started this K-Drama because I felt like I would love the healing sensation it carried. But it turns out, I found a similarity between the characters and me. These siblings, although they work in Seoul, live far from the city. As a result, they have to commute for hours to get to work and back home, and that’s basically me, who spends around four hours a day commuting.

It’s also amazing because I watch the drama while commuting. So every time the scene shows the siblings taking the bus or train, I can relate to the emotions they’re portraying, from the moment they lean their heads on the train pole to the moment they’re enjoying the summer breeze through the bus window.

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More about the K-Drama: just like its title, the main character of this drama is looking for ways to feel ‘liberated’. And as if the whole universe is working together, the book I read this morning reminded me of this character – Yeom Mi Jeong.

In this book I’m reading, the author talks about “Being Selfish.” There is one part that reminded me of Yeom Mi Jeong, whose friends are always fancy and on-the-go and who is always demanded by HR to join the company’s club even though she doesn’t want to. It’s when the author says, “You get to measure your own success against what is important to you. Maybe you just want to go through your life and tick the boxes 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. and then go home and enjoy the non-working part of your existence. That’s OK.”

On another page, the author also quotes an expert she interviewed: “I don’t have any plans apart from just trying to be as happy as I can and continuing the work I do and the happiness I’ve created in the last eighteen months. That’s been really liberating.” Liberating. I felt like I wanted to jump into the K-Drama scene and tell Mi Jeong about this!

I know, we’ve strayed too far from the topic of public transportation to K-Drama to books. But who knows? Maybe there are some of you out there who feels like Mi Jeong and need to hear what the book author has to say.

Anyway, what I want to tell you is, the time you have inside public transport is actually an opportunity to enjoy your own company. And maybe, as you listen to that music, read that book, or watch that K-Drama, a certain thought will come to your mind. A thought that teaches you about life more than the thoughts that come to you when you’re 100% sober, when you’re at work, or when you lie on your bed at night. A thought that is very raw and romantic.

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I love using public transportation, and there’s one story about it.

When I mention how long it takes for me to commute every day, others gasp (out of awe or worry, I don’t know. Maybe both). One day, I told my mom about this, and I said it kind of made me feel good because, “I managed to do this thing that is somehow peculiar for others every day and can still do everything else.” But then my mom said that my reaction was interesting because some people would react to this situation by complaining and saying things like, “See? Look at my life, it’s miserable.” Meanwhile, I reacted to this “positively.” This conversation I had with my mom made me feel even better.

So, as someone who is successful (can I say successful though? It’s not that deep) in turning what can be sufferable into something good, I recommend you see commuting with public transportation in these ways.

Choosing to see the good side of things is not being naïve, you know? Like what Ke Huy Quan said in Everything Everywhere All at Once, “It is strategic and necessary. It’s how I’ve learned to survive through everything.”

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Epilogue

It’s been raining a lot in the past few days, so the sky has been cloudy and the air has been chilly too. With this weather outside, I’m here in my room writing a blog post. Drinking hot mint chocolate, wearing warm socks and pajamas, and having the curtain closed, even though it’s 10 a.m. in freaking July.

Yesterday, too, I spent almost 4 hours in front of the television, watching Legally Blonde 1 & 2 while eating my lunch (changed the rice to konjac rice, although I wasn’t on a diet or anything, but knowing I ate fewer carbs somehow made me feel good).

To all busy ants out there, I hope you can enjoy a cozy time too, every once in a while.

Even if it’s on Monday morning when you’re on the train, standing and holding onto the strap, and suddenly the ray of sunshine gives you—who have been staring outside—a sign for another hopeful day. Even if it’s on Wednesday night when you’re on the bus, sitting with your head resting against the window, and you can feel how comfortably cold the AC is. Or even if you must wait until the weekend like this.

I hope your body, mind, and heart can enjoy a comfy time as well.